Are you stuck in deciding whether you should stay or leave your marriage? Why? In some cases, it is because there seems to be unforgivable betrayal such as infidelity or a spouse tends to become abusive, and the marriage turns destructive, or even a relationship turns as clichéd as it sounds. These basic reasons often make couples fall apart.
Before deciding whether leave or stay in our marriage, we need to know the basic and major reasons why our relationship is more and more serious day by day. Furthermore, it is good for us to:
- Try to reduce the stress in our life.
- Get ourselves on the solid and stable ground so that we may handle everything no matter what comes to our marriage.
- In case our emotional or physical safety relying upon being separated from our mate, it is necessary to make our priority.
- Back up a plan to provide ourselves with a sense of control over our life.
Once making this kind of life-changing decision, attempt to realize that we will lose and don’t count on what we can receive. In fact, if our primary reason for separation is because we are unhappy with the current martial life, bear in mind that being single again will not probably make us happier.
- Do two of us often fuss with each other over some trivial and minor issues?
- Does everything about our spouse irritate us a lot?
- Do we believe that our affection, hope and patience have just all run out?
- Has our mate physically or emotionally abused us? Are we afraid of facing our mate in the daily life?
- May both of us communicate with each other well or do we always end up with a conflict or disagreement? When do we fight? Do we fight totally fair?
- When was the last time we felt sexually attracted together? When was the last time both had fun together? Do we still love him?
- Do many same love troubles keep resurfacing again and again? May we acknowledge that our personal happiness is our own responsibility? Have we ever tried counseling?
- Are we willing to co-parent the rearing of our kids with our ex-spouse?
- Does our mate constantly put us down, criticize us or even attack our selves-esteem? Do we have any respect for him? Does he respect us?
- Can we compromise on the vital matters?
- Are our values and goals different?
- Has our spouse been disloyal and unfaithful?
- Do we have some dreams of divorce or do we dream that he died?
- Do we have any plan if our marriage ends in divorce? Are we able to cope with the emotional and financial stress of separation?
Please be honest about these above questions since they can help us to make the best decision about whether we should stay or leave in our spousal life. No matter what decision we make, be always comfortable with it. Think about children and other factors to have thorough consideration.
Although we all desire to have blissful and contented marriage, why can we live with a spouse who always drinks or abuses us all time? Stand out and believe in ourselves! Perhaps our true mate is waiting somewhere for our discovery! When a door closes, a newer and better one will open! As a result, just putting trust in ourselves, we can live independently without our spouse!
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- should i stay in my marriage